Thursday, November 16, 2017

So...

Image result for Miss Me? animated gif

Ehrm ... is anybody still here?Related image

Because if you're still here, and I haven't been here ... well, I feel really guilty, now.

Image result for i feel really guilty animated gif

Image result for i have a really good reason animated gif

Seriously, though, I have a really good reason.

Image result for excuses animated gif

No! I swear I have a good reason!

Image result for let me explain animated gif

I've had problems with my arthritis in my hands, so typing was basically torture ... and a couple of weeks ago my back decided that I needed to be punished for bending over to pull up my pants so I've been in a muscle relaxer coma for most of the past two weeks.

Image result for threw my back out gif

Please, forgive me.

Image result for nothing's grabbed me animated gif

Right?

Image result for you're not forgiven animated gif

Wow, tough crowd.

Image result for wow animated gif

I'm really sorry.

Image result for i don't know what just came over me animated gif

But seriously, in addition to my health woes, I've been reading my brains out and honestly didn't find any fics that GRABBED me enough to want to do a blog about them ... until now.

Image result for until now animated gif

Image result for it's awesome, right? animated gif

Image result for i know, right? animated gif

So, I bet you're wanting me to quit with the GIFs and start with the recs right about now, huh?

Image result for will you get on with it? animated gif


Wait ... there's money?

Related image


Sorry ... I'm not sure what just happened.

Image result for what the hell just happened animated gif




On with the recs!

First up is a story that is so freakin' wonderful I just want to scream at everyone to go read it. It's called The Untitled Series, which is kind of misleading since it's not, in fact, a series, but trust me, read it!

Summary: Set after new Moon. The Cullens realize exactly how much damage Edward's leaving caused Bella. A few simple words can cause immense pain and emotional wounds that only a family's love can heal, specifically the love of a father.

Let me preface this by saying I never really bought that someone such as Bella, who felt the absence of her true love so acutely, that she was reduced to this...

Related image

was just magically cured and went on with her life like this...

Image result for woman skipping through field of flowers animated gif

...after her true love came back.

You guys, this fic is exactly what I needed, IMHO, to bridge the end of New Moon with the beginning of Eclipse. It's Bella dealing with Edward being gone in what seemed to her like the only way she could after Charlie threatened to send her to Jacksonville. 


While Edward was gone, Bella started taking over-the-counter sleeping meds to keep her asleep through her nightmares so she wouldn't wake Charlie up with her screams. As a result of the sleeping meds, or getting too little sleep, she always felt hungover or just so tired that she resorted to taking over-the-counter stimulants like No Doz to combat that. In addition to those problems, she was always nauseated from the pain of her separation from Edward so she took a lot of Dramamine, as well.

After rescuing Edward in Italy and returning to Forks, Bella still struggles with his abandonment, especially when he leaves with most of the family for an extended hunting trip.

She is at the pharmacy, looking for some Dramamine when Carlisle sees her. The pharmacy is out and when Bella leaves, she falls apart by her truck. Carlisle brings her home with him and he and Emmett, who also stayed behind, embark on a mission to help her get past her anxiety, feelings of abandonment and depression.

One-by-one, Jasper and Esme are drawn into Bella's recovery and help with it in every way they can. But it's really Carlisle who gets her through the majority of this crisis.

Seriously, you guys, this is the perfect bridging-New Moon-to-Eclipse AU story. It's short, but powerful, and I read it in 2 to 3 hours. More like devoured it. If you like NM AU stories, check it out.



The Untitled Series can be found here:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9219586/1/The-Untitled-Series

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next story I'd like to feature here today is, Small Town Gossip by LASMKE. Unfortunately, this author is no longer with us and her family pulled all of her stories, but I got my hands on it and it's really something special. There is no summary in the copies that I have, so I'm going to do my best to give you one.

Summary: Bella's parents die in a plane crash. When she goes through their things, she discovers something that her mother kept from her that shakes her to her to her very foundations.

Bella Dwyer is a sophomore at Arizona State University majoring in Biomedical Sciences with a minor in horticulture. She is sitting in her psychology class one day when a police officer interrupts class asking for her.

The officer informs her that her parents, Renée and Phil Dwyer, were killed in a plane crash. After the funeral, she is going through their things, trying to find the necessary documents for her parents' lawyer to have their house put in her name so she can sell it, etc., when she discovers a box marked, "Forks." She has no idea what it pertains to so she puts it aside for a bit.

When she goes through it, she discovers some pictures of her mom with a man (among other people) she doesn't know,  marriage certificate for her mom and a Charles Swan, and a birth certificate with her name on it naming Charles Swan as her father.

Needless to say, Bella is shocked and confused because she grew up believing Phil to be her father.

She does some research online about Charles Swan, and finds out he is the Chief of Police in Forks, Washington, but is unable to find out much else about the man, or her mother's time in Forks. So she decides to go to Forks to see if she can find out anything else about him and why Renée hid this part of her life from Bella.

She discovers that in a small town, everybody is in everybody else's business, which she doesn't like at all. No matter where she goes, people ask her why she's there and it's disconcerting to her.

Gorgeous perfect strangers even think it's okay to just climb in the cab of her pick-up truck whenever the mood strikes them.

This describes a journey of a young woman who goes from discovering the existence of a surprise father, to learning how to function in her new normal, along with some help from a gorgeous, nosy stranger and his family.

It's really a special story.

I couldn't find a banner so here's a good pic of Rob and Kristen together.
Image result for robert pattinson and kristen stewart

As I said above, the author is deceased and her family pulled all her stories, but I have copies of it in PDF, mobi and epub formats, if you're interested. Either leave a comment here, or message me on Facebook.

Here's the link to my page:

https://www.facebook.com/smithbelynda

And here's the link to my Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/255753651486648/

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For my last rec this installment of SS&AW, I have a fic called Hot Tree Guy by dontlookdontask, and I've gotta say I really enjoyed this fic. The plot was believable, the characters well-developed and while there were lemons, they weren't the screaming orgasmasplosions typical in most of fanfic.

Summary: Bella has a tiny apartment, a dwindling savings fund, and a giant dog. All she wants is a nice little Christmas tree.

It's on a beautiful, 68 degree day in December that Bella finds herself at a Christmas tree lot near her New Jersey apartment. She has $300.00 a hole in her pocket and wants a tree that won't cause too much damage in her tiny apartment when her dog, Jake, knocks the thing over with his tail.

What she finds is an overly-friendly, hyper, female lot attendent who is obsessed with finding Bella her perfect tree. When said lot attendant finally talks Bella into a bigger tree than she was looking for, she volunteers her surly brother to carry it home for her. And so, Hot Tree Guy enters Bella's life.

I really enjoyed this story. As I said above the summary, it's very well-written and the characters were normal, albeit, good-looking, everyday people.

 Image result for banner picture for fanfiction story hot tree guy

Hot Tree Guy can be found here:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11687310/1/Hot-Tree-Guy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That's it for this installment of Smut Sluts and Angst Whores, y'all. And remember...
Image result for we all float down here animated gif

...clowns are creepy as fuck. Sweet dreams!

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Everyone Says This About Me

"Look at her,"

Image result for spreading sunshine wherever I go animated gif

Because drama, y'all.

Image result for drama animated gif

Good lord, the drama that happened in my group last night. Mind you, not my drama. My bitches (and you all know who you are, you bodacious babes) and I were talking about another group's drama and it spilled all over my group.

Image result for long story short animated gif


It's a really long story. I'll tell you all about it.


Image result for inigo montoya let me sum up animated gif

Nah, I'm not even gonna do that. Suffice it to say, drama that started in another group was talked about in my group and I've been banned for life from the group where the drama started and the owner of the group blocked me on Facebook. Not only that but people who are in my group who had very little or nothing at all to do with the initial post in my group were unfriended by said group owner, removed from the group, or both.

Anyway, she has no right to come into my group and see what's posted and police the members we have in common, for breaking the rules of her group, which is what she did.


I'm like a disease.

Image result for i'm like a disease animated gif

Understand?

Image result for what's going on animated gif

That's probably for the best.

I know it's been a while since I posted here.

Image result for it's been a long time animated gif


Oh, shut up, Rose. It hasn't been that long. It's only been seven weeks.

And while the past day has sucked for me and my bodacious bitches, some good stuff has happened, too.

The Biggest Dick Ever contest, which I entered anonymously, ended and announced the winners and I won a judge's choice award!

 Image may contain: one or more people and text

So, that was totally awesome!

Related image

But seriously, it was my first contest and I put off writing it until the last possible minute. I basically spewed just under 10,000 words during the last weekend to enter and I had absolutely no hope that anyone would like it, let alone that one of the judges would pick it as their favorite, so I was pretty shocked about it.

This is the banner that the wonderful Ipsita Chaudhuri made for me.

Image may contain: 2 people

Isn't it gorgeous? She did a great job!

Anyway, congratulations to all of the amazing authors who participated in the contest and to the winners. And thank you to the amazing people who put on the contest. You're all awesome.

Image result for you're awesome animated gif


Another good thing that's happened since I last posted is that a bunch of great WIPs have started.

Image result for yay! animated gif

Let's get to those, shall we?

Image result for I thought you'd never ask animated gif

When I say a bunch of new WIPs have started, I mean a bunch.


Image result for let's get this party started animated gif

First up, one of my favorite new WIPs is called Rent-A-Vampire, by moosals.

Summary: 
In a world where it has become the norm to date a supernatural being, no self-respecting woman would turn up at a party without one, would she?

This one starts out funny and is pretty light, overall, but there are moments where I either want to throttle Bella (she is annoyingly, stubbornly, deliberately, and obsessively obtuse in her refusal to believe that vampires, werewolves, and other supernatural creatures exist), or sit Edward down on my lap and give him mooshy hugs and stroke his hair and make him feel better.

In short, I am loving this fic. A couple of my theories have turned out to be valid (I love when that happens, btw), and I can't wait to find out some things that I still don't have answers to.


Story Banner

Rent-A-Vampire can be found here:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12584528/1/Rent-A-Vampire

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The lovely Lara Poe Norman, aka: MeteorOnAMoonlessNight started a new drabble fic that features a Stripperella who loves her job and a hot, wealthy Edward who wants to rescue her from that job.

It's called Right Where I Want To Be and it's wonderful. Do you want a snippet from it? Hmmmm?


Image result for do ya animated gif

Why so aggressive, Dirty Harry? Go home or talk to an empty chair, or something, would ya?

So, here's the snippet from Right Where I Want To Be...


No amount of twiddling my own clit has cured the aching fire that gorgeous man left me with. I don't want to want him, and I sure as hell don't need his type of rescuing. Ignoring him, which isn't easy since I can feel his presence behind me, I make my way around the room to earn my money. When a wall of heat radiates against my mostly bare back, I pick up my pace. Knowing that I'm asking for trouble, I stalk around the curved wall that leads to the private rooms. Hands grab my upper arms, pushing me into one of the rooms, and I'm pressed up against the door as soon as it slams closed.


Green fire burns me, and the lust ratchets up as his hands run roughly over my ass and up to my tits, massaging and groping. I gasp as his long fingers make their way to silk and lace, pushing into the front and swiping down my slit, teasing my entrance before coming back up to circle my clit.  “I haven't been able to take my mind off you, and it's never been that way before.” Edward leans in, his nose skimming along behind my ear. “I like being in charge,” he rumbles in my ear, and I shiver.


“I wouldn't mind that at all,” I reply breathily.


“I'm going to take you to my place tomorrow night. And I'm going to fuck you until you can't walk.”


“Oh, yes,” I whimper. His nose is still running along my skin, tingling my jaw and down to my throat.


And then he pushes me away from the door and leaves the room. Day-um!!! I think I need to cool off a bit. Image result for water in face  animated gif It's good to know my obesssion with GIFs is still alive and well, right? Image result for right?  animated gif

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the snippet from Right Where I Want To Be. I know I did. Right Where I Want To Be can be found here: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12604507/1/Right-Where-I-Want-to-Be ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Another WIP which started recently is a mystery fic called The Mystery of El Jardin by MarieCarro. Summary: Ten lucky college kids receive the chance to vacation for one week at a luxury resort on a private island in the Caribbean when they win a random draw contest held at their school. However, it becomes apparent quickly that this vacation will stay with them all forever. This one is four chapters in and starts on a plane carrying the lucky winners of a vacation to a luxury resort. There are ten of them and they all go to the same university. Edward Cullen is the capable pilot, a former fighter pilot in the US Navy who was discharged for punching his commanding officer in the jaw. Once the plane sets down, after a turbulent and bumpy landing, the passengers disembark only to find that the island appears to be deserted. What could have possibly happened? I'm still waiting to find that out. Image may contain: 2 people, people standing and text

The Mystery of El Jardin can be found here:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12599653/1/The-Mystery-of-El-Jard%C3%ADn

     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the last fic I'm recommending this week, I have I Dare You by araeo.

Summary: 
He's the guy she's always wanted. She's the girl he shouldn't want. Bro code says you don't go for your friends' ex-girlfriends. It also says you don't go for their sisters. What happens when you breach the bro code?

Gosh, what can I say about this fic? I just love it so much. Edward and Bella love each other and have for a while now, but Edward is Bella's older brother's little sister and they're both worried what will happen when Emmett finds out about them.

The writing is top notch and araeo's pop culture references are hilarious. I love this story so much.


Image may contain: 4 people, people standing and text

I Dare You can be found here:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12600643/1/I-Dare-You

     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I know that this blog post has been heavy with authors for whom I beta, but I'm not just betaing them.

I
read them. I get invested in the characters. I enjoy them. 
If I didn't enjoy the stories I beta, there's no way I'd put them in the blog. I just wanted to clear that up.

Anyway, y'all. I was up until five in the morning chatting with one of my friends not connected to this fandom. He was telling me how to set up a grow room so I could embark on an exciting and lucrative career as a marijuana grower.


Image result for what?!?  animated gif

Don't scoff, dude makes bank!

Image result for making it rain  animated gif

He just happens to live in a state where the sweet chiba is decriminalized.

Image result for movie characters getting high  animated gif

Why, yes, character Kristen Stewart played in American Ultra whose name I don't remember and am too lazy to Google for, I do, but I don't have any at the moment. Le sigh.

This is beginning to feel like the blog that never ends so I'm going to say goodbye, for now.

Image result for see ya  animated gif

Have a great evening and stay safe until we meet again!

Thursday, July 6, 2017

It's Summertime

And...

Image result for i'm so excited animated gif

I know, I know. Y'all are wondering why I'm so excited, aren't you?

I have several reasons. The first of which is that...

Image result for school's out animated gif

...and I don't have to be up at the asscrack of dawn to take Katie to her school bus!

Second, because of the fact that school's out and I don't have to be up at the asscrack of dawn to take Katie to her school bus, I get to...

Image result for sleep animated gif


...sleep until the asscrack of noon!

Third, I've been binge watching Arrow, The Flash and Supergirl in order so I can see all the crossovers between them. And Stephen Amell is so freakin' hot. Like, nuclear hot. Like, I'm walking on the surface of the sun hot. 


Image result for stephen amell animated gif


I <3 him almost as much as I <3 Rob.

Image result for say it ain't so animated gif


Awww, I love you, too, Ian. Don't fret.

Image result for Ian somerhalder animated gif

That's totally my hand he's kissing. Pay no attention to Nina Dobrev.

Anyway, do you want to know the biggest reason I'm so excited right now?


Image result for do ya do ya animated gif

(I know I've used this gif twice, but it's awesome so...)

The reason I'm the most excited I've been in a long time (about fic, anyway) is because...


Image result for explosion animated gif

...Shadow Masen is writing a new fic.  

And, not only is she writing a new fic, she starts posting this coming Monday (7/10/17)! 

Image result for girls jumping up and down excited animated gif

And, not only does it start posting next Monday, but I have a snippet of it for you all to read!

  GIF

What do you think of the snippet gif? I don't want to brag, but I made that bad boy myself!

So, is everybody as excited as I am for this snippet?


Image result for girls jumping up and down excited animated gif

I know, right?

Well, here it is. A snippet from the first chapter of Shadow Masen's new fic, Skin Deep.



She knows.  How the fuck do they always know?  Is there a secret handshake for the popular club?  A tattoo?  Do they all have the fucking dark mark on their forearms?  What is it?  If we normal people could just figure it out, we could break in undetected, but somehow I don’t think that’s going to happen today.


And why, why did I look down?  Why can’t I maintain eye contact and say the things I’m thinking?  Why do I always have to collapse in on myself?  Fuck!         

My cheeks are on fire as I stammer, “No, I—”

“Nah, she’s Chief Charlie’s long-lost kid.  That must be her own part-time job,” Ken doll fires off, earning an approving look from Bubbly.
“Does daddy need some extra money, now that he has an extra mouth to feed?” Bubbly asks with a smile, and now the whole group is grinning and elbowing each other.
“No, you fucktard, I don’t have a job, my dad is just fine, and this shirt is awesome.  It’s you morons who are behind the times and clueless.”  But the words stick in my throat like they always do, and instead I just shake my head as tears well in my eyes.  I need to leave.  Now.

Image may contain: text Well? What do you all think? Image result for It's so awesome animated gif

So good!

Image result for monica geller I KNOW animated gif


Y'all, I'm one of Shad's pre-readers, and I basically re-read the whole thing every time she sends me a new chapter. As many times as I've read the first (through whatever) chapter, I am not sick of it. And I just want her to keep sending me ALL THE WORDS!!!

So, make sure you all set your alerts so you know when she starts posting!

Not only am I excited about Shad's new fic, but the always lovely BitterHarpy, AKA Stephanie Smith Busbin, has started a new fic. It's called The American Princess. There are only two chapters posted, so far (her beta really needs to get off her ass and get the third chapter back to her), but from what she's told me about it (I'm her beta for this story), it's gonna be great.

Summary: 
With great power comes great responsibility. Something Prince Edward knows all too well. When his first choice for a bride is denied, he knows he needs to act fast to change the King's mind. Enter American bad ass actress extraordinaire, Bella Swan, the least suitable person for the role. But what happens when she turns the family dynamic and Edward's plan on its royal head?

Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, people standing and outdoor

The American Princess can be found here:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12554296/1/The-American-Princess


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Image result for but wait there's more animated gif

Not only is Shad starting a new fic next week, and not only did the Harpy start a new fic, but the ever amazing MeteorOnAMoonlessNight, AKA: Lara Poe Norman, just started a new fic!

Image result for boom animated gif

It's just too much!

Image result for we're not worthy animated gif

Lara's new fic is called Seismic Shift. I'm the beta, again. Natch! I have to be her beta. I love her writing so much.
Summary: Earthquakes so rarely occur in the Pacific Northwest that the phenomenon causes the members of the Quileute tribe to investigate. They never would have expected to find her. She is stubborn, wild, and fiercely independent, and she willfully goes against everything they try to teach her. Especially when it comes to staying away from vampires.

Image may contain: 1 person, text

Seismic Shift is available here:


https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12551082/1/Seismic-Shift

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


So, those are the new WIPs I'm excited about. I've read a couple of complete fics that I really liked, lately. One that I really liked and absolutely devoured was called History Repeats Itself by debruk34.

Summary: 
"I hope you have a child just like you someday," many parents tell their children. Edward and Bella are raising their family; how will they react when that statement comes true?

In this story, Bella and Edward are childhood friends who grow up to be high school sweethearts. When they are sixteen, Bella gets pregnant. This is their story, but it's also the story of their oldest boy, Emmett, who gets his high school girlfriend, Rosalie, pregnant.

Each chapter tells a little bit about the present day, and about Bella and Edward's past, while revealing what's going on with Emmett and Rosalie.

And in this story, the past really does repeat itself in more ways than one.

There is no banner picture, so I'll just give you a young looking pic of Edward and Bella.
Image result for bella and edward

History Repeats Itself can be found here:https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12355572/1/History-Repeats-Itself

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another story I read in the past week is called Day to Day by The Irish Cullen.

Summary: 
When Edward's older brother Emmett decides it time for Edward to come out of his OCD shell, Edward will find himself doing something he never imagined he would. Falling in love. A story about truly finding yourself and living your life for you.

In this story, Edward is an accountant who has OCD. He keeps to a very rigid schedule, and is extremely awkward around people he doesn't know. Because of this, he has pretty much convinced himself that he will never find love and he's happy being alone. 

His older brother, Emmett, has always been very protective of him, but once Emmett meets Rosalie Hale, he decides that Edward needs to break out of his shell. With that in mind, Emmett basically forces Edward to go to Las Vegas where Edward can't function because of his OCD.

Edward goes back home and he and Emmett have a major falling out. Just before the trip to Vegas, though, Emmett convinces Edward to take over the books for Rosalie's business, because her former accountant embezzled from some of his clients and took off.

Rosalie has her best friend, Bella, deliver the documents from Rosalie's business to Edward. Both are smitten, but neither of them think that the other would ever want to be with them.

Because of the trip to Vegas and his falling out with Emmett, Edward's OCD is triggered to the point where he is hurting himself. He's depressed and almost to the point where he wants to just die. It's in this frame of mind when he meets up with Bella Swan for the second time.

She can see that something is drastically wrong with Edward and brings him to her apartment and takes care of him. They both admit that they have feelings for each other and basically commit to each other from that point on.

What follows is their journey into falling in love and Edward's journey through getting control of his OCD. There are punctuation and grammar issues, but the story is so good I just didn't mind all that. There's also a sequel called Living Life.


Image result for banner picture for day to day by the irish cullen



Day to Day can be found here:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7300727/1/Day-to-Day


And Living life can be found here:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8176515/1/Living-Life

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, that's it for this edition of Smut Sluts and Angst Whores, boys and girls. I have chapters to beta for a few people. If I don't get those chapters back to them soon, I think I may have a few torches and pitchforks in my future.

Related image

And that would be bad. How would I ever find out what happens in all the WIPs I'm following if they kill me? See you next time.

EDIT: Oops. I just about forgot. Voting is now open for The Biggest Dick Ever contest. Be sure you go read all of the fabulous entries and vote for your favorites. There are entries from Smut Sluts you may or may not know!

Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, text and closeup

The Biggest Dick Ever contest can be found here:

https://www.fanfiction.net/u/8731303/BiggestDickEver


Until we meet again...

Image result for peace out bitches animated gif